


Mistakes Made Right

by bjfic_archivist



Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe, Canon, Child Abuse, Ethan Gold Bashing, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Points of View
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-11-19
Updated: 2004-11-19
Packaged: 2018-12-27 02:28:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12071772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bjfic_archivist/pseuds/bjfic_archivist
Summary: What happens when Brian figures out the mistake he made?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Note from IrishCaelan, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Brian_Justin_Fanfiction_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in September 2017. I posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/bjfic/profile).

This story was written by me and a friend of mine who's English isn't very good,Shiri..this one is for you. so I changed some things and sent it to my beta who is the best Ponga..thanks for everything. I want to also thanks to all the people who read this and helped me with it.

* * *

JUSTIN:

I can't believe it. Brian doing his sister a favor... and what did he get in return?? A big fist in his face.  
How can she accuse her own brother of such a terrible thing.  
So I needed to do something.... And not just because Brian did so much for me,  
I did it because it was the right thing to do.  
I can swear - BRIAN DIDN'T DO IT!!!!  
So now I'm on my way to the loft, I need to give Brian his bracelet.back.  
Maybe I'll call him,I'll tell him to meet me downstairs?. No that would be to strange.  
O.k. So now I'm knocking at his door. God.. Why did I come here?  
He opens the door! GOD, he looks so damn beautiful. Such a beautiful face..... God's face!  
Ooh! Come on.. Come on. Justin you didn't come here for that!  
Just give him the fucking bracelet, Give it to him and go!

BRIAN:

I open the door and I see him.  
He holding my bracelet in his hand and than he puts it on me.  
It looks like hes grown-up so much since.Since what Brian? Since he got hurt... Don't go there. Don't go...  
But I can't help it, 'Cause he looks so confused and so uncertain,but his face, those lips..Those red lips  
I've got to have him HAVE HIM just one more last time.  
So I bend my head a little..And I...I'm kissing him. It's so good to kiss him.To kiss my baby again.... To kiss my Sunshine....  
But he is not mine.  
"Shouldn't you be getting back to your boyfriend?"

JUSTIN:

I'm standing here like an idiot in the middle of the street, And I can't even move, it's like my legs are stuck to the floor.  
All I can do is to think about Brian and at the way he kissed me.And the way he touch my hair....And...And  
Ethan  
Oh my god! What am I going to tell him.  
I'm coming up to Ethan's.I'm coming up to my.... O.k.. What can I do? It doesn't feel like home.  
I'm going in to the apartment and he sits there just sits and looks at me.  
I think he knows, knows that I was there... knows that I gave Bri....  
He doesn't know shit. Just act normal and relax.  
But he sits their and looks,he looks very mad.  
"Where have you been Justin?"  
My heart skips a beat "At Woody's"  
"At such a late hour?"  
I knew it,he knows "What are you, my mother?"  
"No. I'm your lover"  
" So? What am I now, permitted to go out?" he knows.

BRAIN:

 

red, blue,yellow.... all the colors mixed together  
red lips..... blond hair...... blue eyes.......  
blue eyes..... red lips...... blond hair.......  
kissing him.  
loving him.  
holding him  
fucking him  
.  
.  
and than I wake up.

 

JUSTIN:  
I'm at the diner, it's the morning shift. The place is full of customers. and I'm busy giving everyone of them the best service I can give.  
But it doesn't really matter , 'cause I'm not here I'm with him, my heart belongs to him.  
Debbie's calling me, asking what's wrong with me, and I pretend that I don't understand. but she knows me to well.  
She's telling me to go home, saying that I don't look so well.  
And I want to go, but I don't know where I'm supposed to go. I don't know where my home is. I want it to be so much,  
I want to be where I belong, to stop pretending, to stop feeling so alone..... to feel normal again  
Suddenly Ethan is here and I didn't even notice when he came in. And I cant help it. I'm thinking about last night again.  
What is he doing here? Did he come to ask questions, come to drill me again?  
"Hey pretty face" I hate when he says that, makes me feel so cheap, reminds me of his stupid friend.  
He's standing close to me. "Hey pretty face, how about a quiet night at home?"  
There's that word again 'home' "Ethan, I'm busy,I'm working!"  
"Yes! I know you working! You're always working , working at the diner,working with Michael... WORKING WITH FUCKING BRIAN!  
Or maybe I should say FUCKING fucking BRI"---  
"Sunshine!"Debbie's coming.... "Sunshine, table 9 is waiting!" saved by the bell, a big wigged red bell.

DEBBIE:  
Who the fuck does he think he his? This motherfucking son of a bitch, this asshole, piece of shit  
talking to my Sunshine like that.Such a big idiot.

JUSTIN:  
I'm going to table 9, Todd sits there,it's strange to see him actually wearing some clothes..for a change.  
"How are you Justin?" always the polite one, always with a smile on his face. I guess having sex 24/7 will do that to you.  
"I'm fine" that's a lie. "So what can I get you?”  
"Do you have any fish on the menu?" I think he's been in the back room to long.  
I'm about to answer Todds question and than I hear him. " Can I get some fucking service over here???"  
I'm taking Todds order and then I need to get Brian's. Debbie is to busy as it is and...I can't… can't let him enjoy the benefit of the doubt. Can't let him think he can have me back with out a fight.  
FIGHT BRIAN, FIGHT YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE, FIGHT FOR ME. 'cause God damn it I don't know how to do it anymore.  
I'm tired.So tired, and I don't want to know,don't want to know what I know now.  
I didn't leave because of Ethan. I thought I loved him, but now I can't even stand him any more.  
Ethan was just a cover up.  
I don't even think I left because of the rage party.  
I wanted him to love, to love me. I know HE cared about me,maybe even loved me, but he felt the need to hide it. If he hides his feelings for me... than... than... what it's worth??? 

BRIAN:  
I'm at the diner. I'm sitting with the guys, having bad coffee and even a worst meal, but who are you kidding Brian? You didn't come here to eat.  
I'm looking at him. He looks so tried. He sure as hell can use some rest. Why Debbie hasn't sent him home. She probably did and the fucking twat refused to go.  
Ian is here to. I can see them talking. Some how I have the feeling that it is not a nice lovers’ conversation.  
Ethan's standing there looking like he going to throw a fit. I'm about to call him "Jus.." but than I can here Deb yelling "Sunshine table 9" got to love that woman.  
Now he's talking to the guy in the table next mine. Hey, I think it's Todd, taking a break from the HARD work.   
I can see Justin's face. He smiles, but it's not the Sunshine smile I know.  
I've got to do something. I need to make sure that he's alright. "Can I get some fucking service over here???" I hope Deb doesn't come over.  
Good the right person comes over. You need find something smart to say with out letting him know that...I...what the fuck is he doing here!?

JUSTIN:  
I'm about to take Brian’s order. Oh! God not again. Ethan is standing so close to me. I can smell his cologne and I don't like the 'fragrance' at all.   
"Justin!?"   
"Ethan I'm working" I can not believe this!  
"Working with him?" he starts to raise his voice.   
I'm hoping that if I ignore him, maybe... just maybe he will go.  
I'm holding the coffee pot in my hand. I can feel my hand start to tremble. Why can't I have a break, why now?  
I'm about to switch hands, hoping that nobody will notice. I can feel Brian put his hand on mine, he knows.. he always knew. That's why I love him so much, always will.  
I feel my hand start to relax. The pain is fading away. Just him and me...God... it feels so good. Always knows how to touch me.. This is our best times.. When he touch me...when he moves his fingers in my hand. FUCKING SHIT IT HURTS!!!!.  
Now Ethan is the one that’s holding my hand. I try to pull away, but I can't. "Ethan let go. Ethan???" " That how you work with him? LETTING HIM TOUCH YOU LIKE THAT LETTING…" I can't hear anything. I'm starting to see black shadows, and it hurts. I'm feeling the tears falling from the pain. "Ethan, Please...ETH.." suddenly I can see Brian's hands running on me. Brian?????  
What the hell...

Ethan is on the floor.  
I can see Michael and Ben holding Brian. "YOU FUCKER !!! IF YOU EVER TOUCH HIM AGAIN I'II KILL YOU!!" I never saw Brian this mad.  
Brian's releasing the guys hands. "GET UP" He holds Ethan by his shirt..."YOU SON OF A BITCH" Dragging him to the diner's door.  
I'm standing near table 9.  
It's so quiet. I think I never seen the diner with so many people here and at the same time so quiet.  
Brian comes to stand next to me. He touchs my cheek...caressing it "Are you okay" No I'm not  
"Yeah" he starts to touch my hand, but I can't be here.. I need to get out of this place.  
" Thanks" I kiss his cheek and go.


	2. Mistakes Made Right

Thx again to Shiri and to my beta Ponga. You are the best. Thanks to all my friends and other people who have helped with this story.

* * *

BRIAN:  
When I was 12 years old, I broke my arm.  
I think it happened when I was running in the park,  
after that. I came home.. funny some how I can remember it like it happened last night.  
I.. I...came home and my dad was there...  
sitting on the couch. Sitting and drinking, always,always DRINKING.  
And than... he... "BRIAN" it's weird but sometimes I'm so surprised.  
Sometimes I don't think he even knows my name.  
"BRIAN!!! I'M CALLING YOU!!! WHAT ARE YOU DEAF? "  
"Dad..I..I..."  
"YOU WHAT?? YOU STUPID AND DEAF"  
"Dad I broke my leg."  
" DAAAADDDD I BROKKKEE MY LEEEGGGGG!!" I say more loudly  
"WHAT?SO NOW YOU ARE A STUPID AND DEAF AND INVALID?"  
He just yells at me without any reason at all. I just want what him to love me to care, to...  
to love me. Ooh!!!   
It's starts. I thought that... that...that maybe this time he .. he...  
AND THEN I CAN FEEL IT AND...  
He's hitting me, his FISTS ALL OVER MY BODY...IT HURTS.  
WHY DAD? WHY DADDY, WHY ?  
.  
I don't care WHY.  
I don't care WHO.  
There is just one 'THING' I care about .   
And......  
I won't let IT happen to HIM.

JUSTIN:  
I'm at the park sitting on the bench,the same bench Brian and I used to sit on,when we brought Gus to play here.  
I love this place. I love to come here and DRAW.  
THAT FUCKER! HOW COULD HE!!?  
I just couldn't believe that he.. I mean...  
I remember when I saw him in the first time.  
He looked so gentle Like such a really calm person.  
And NOW, god it't like he's not the same person.  
I'm back at Ethan's place.  
I'm lookin for my bag. Funny it's the same bag I used for packing my stuff from Brian's loft.  
God! was it the right decision? I mean, now that ....  
Now I know I didn't leave Brian because I wanted to be with Ethan.  
I left because things between us were bad.  
I mean.... well to be with Brian never was easy. But I loved him so much.  
Who are you kidding Justin? You still LOVE him.  
LOVE HIM TO DEATH.  
I think it all started to go bad when he brought me this STUPID present for my birthday..  
What was he thinking to himself? that.. that god.  
I thought about this incident so many times.   
Maybe ... I don't really know, 'cause he... !  
To know what Brian thinks is beyond me!  
There was a time I thought I knew.There was a time I thought he gave me this...  
I don't even how to call it... this 'special' present?  
I thought he did it because he felt the need to...  
god sometime HE CAN be such an asshole .  
I still think that the reason he did this IS...Because he did pee on my work and after that he had  
TO APOLOGIZE.. apologizing for BRIAN FUCKING KINNEY   
NOW that's a BIG thing.Maybe he thought that if he apologized, he would actually be admitting that..  
that he loves me. And of course he didn't wanted to do that.  
So instead he... It's like he tried to remove IT.  
Jesus! I have such a big headache.  
Maybe he.. "OH MY GOD"  
Suddenly Ethan is inside the apartment.  
Why the hell did he have to bang on the the door that way.  
"JUSTIN" he's comming towards me.  
I'm trying to ignore him. I just don't have the power to deal with him  
"JUSTIN" he yells again but I'm not saying any thing.  
"What are you doing"? he saw the bag.  
"JUSTIN I'M TALKING TO YOU!"he screams  
"IT'S SO FUNNY THAT YOU ARE THE ONE WHO IS MAD! AFTER....AFTER WHAT BRIAN DID..  
YOU NEED TO APOLOGIZE!!!"He scolds  
"WHAT!!?? I CAN NOT BELIEVE THIS." I begin to say.  
" HOW COULD YOU LET BRIAN TOUCH YOU LIKE THAT?"He's right in front of me yelling  
"HE WAS HELPING WITH MY HAND"I begin to try to explain though I dont know why I want to.  
"NOTHING IS WRONG WITH YOUR HAND." he screams at my face  
"WHAT?? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PROBLEMS.."I ask.  
DO KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE THAT YOUR BEST THING IS GETTING FUCKED BY SOMEONE OTHER THEN ME!!  
DO YOU??"He is starting to scare me.I know how he gets when hes like this.I dont say anything and he begins to cool down.  
"Fine... so you have problems with your hand, but still why do you let  
BRIAN ALMOST FUCK YOU ON THE TABLE."  
"Are you an idiot, Ethan?" I need to make my point. I can't give up to him.  
"Brain didn't do anything wrong. he WAS THE ONE WHO ALWAYS HELPED WITH MY HAND. YOU WERE THE ONE WHO HURT MY HAND."I yell back.TIred of this already.  
"I JUST HELD YOUR HAND, STOP ACTTING LIKE A BABY.  
I WILL NOT LET BRIAN PUT HIS DIRTY HANDS ON MY BOYFRIEND. I WILL NOT !"  
"You know what, Ethan? You shouldn't worry yourself, 'cause you don't have a boyfriend anymore. Your boy is leaving,and I actually think you never had a BOYFRIEND... NOT FOR REAL."   
I feel like I'm going to exsplode. I'm so tired and I feel like I'm going to...  
I need to get out of. here.

DAPHNE:  
I'm so tired and I want to sleep but I can't 'cause I need to study for this fucking test. I need some coffee so I can be up all night. I really can use some... god! Who is at door now?   
"Juster! haven't see you a long timmmmmme. O.k what's wrong?"  
"Nothing" this is so not true.  
"Come on, tell it to your old friend" Damn! Some thing's wrong with him.  
"You are not old." "Yeah. you right, but my age isn't your problem. What IS your problem?"I ask him again with more concern.  
"I don't have a problem!."he saids.  
"LIAR!!" I know him better then he thinks.  
"I'm not a liar."he sneers  
"LIAR LIAR PANTS ON FIRE! LIAR LIAER...." I sing at him smiling at my kids song.  
"JESUS! Can you please stop singing.... Stop singing Daph!" He saids to me through clentched teeth.  
"I'LL STOP SINGING WHEH YOU TELL ME WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM.. LIAR...LIAR!" I start singing again.Damn it used to be so easy to make him talk about stuff..  
"FINE! I broke upwith Ethan" He sneers again.  
"I know" I say smiling at him.I soooo know him.  
"What, how do you know?"He asks me with that 'just caught my hand in the cookie jar' look.  
"Well... 'Cause I have a really big bag in here and doesn't belong to me. And beside being without Ethan is not a prob... " I begin to say with a sly smile.  
DAPH!"He smiles a little but I can see he really feels bad.  
"It really isn't a problem! Justin you can do MUCH better than Ethan. I know this guy, he's such a babe.He has these lovely hazel eyes... and brown hair and a body to die for and..." I know he knows who I am talking about.  
"Daph, the last thing that I need right now is to think about Brian."Justin saids with sad eyes.  
" I don't agree."I tell him  
"You are a pain in my ass."he is trying to hide the smile  
"Yeah, but you love it anyway." God it's like... pulling somebody's teeth out. "Come on, lets go out. We can have a drink" He looks at me with arched eyebrows.  
"We can't."he says.  
"Why not?" I ask with my own eyebrows arched.  
"'Cause you have a test to study for." He saids laughing  
"How do you know that !!?? ''I already know the answer but have to ask.  
"Cause you have 1000 books on your table."he says laughing at my non-forgetful ways.  
"Mmm Good one. Fuck it, lets go to Woody's" I am in the mood for a drink after talking about Ethan  
"Fine" He says laughing "Fine" I repeat back. "Fine" we both say at the same time,laughing like the old days.

Later at Woody's:  
"DAPH, I'm really glad we came here." he saids after downing another shot of Jim Beam..He needed this time.Time to go out and have some fun. After he was with Ethan... well' no wonder he's so depressed. Ethan and his 'want to be' friends. YAK!   
There is only one thing I can say a about him- "Good riddence." Not realizing I said that out loud.  
"What?"Justin saids to me.  
"Nothing. Hey... there's Brian. Hi Brian!"I call to him waving my hand at him.  
"Daph,I'm goin to kill you"Justin saids lowering his head.  
"Shut-up and stop moving so much " I say to him,hes acting like a child.  
"Stop acting like my mom" He whispers to me. "I'm not acting like your mom. I'm only trying to think of your best interests"smiling at him and he smiles back,knowing that I'm right.  
"HI BRIAN" We both say in unison.  
"Hi guys, You come to have some fun?" Brian saids to us,but most his attention on Justin with concern in his eyes..I see nothing has changed that. I smile to myself knowing they will end up back together.  
"Yeah.Well boys I'm going to say 'hi' to Emmett. See ya!"I say before I take off,leaving them to each other.  
"Daph!" Justin saids with eyes asking why.  
"Got to go!" I said to them both.

BRIAN::  
I can see from a long distance Daphne and Justin sitting next to the bar.They arguing about something like they always do.  
I don't worry about that. They argue and fight, but after a minute they forget what all the fuss was about.  
But I do worry about... I'm so scared that Ian will hurt him...AGAIN!  
That fucker! I think that if Michael wasn't there holding me, I would have really killed him.  
That SON OF A BITCH MOTHERFUCKER! IF HE EVER TOUCHES MY BABY AGAIN I WILL HURT HIM SO BAD!!!  
I WILL HUNT HIM DOWN AND...AND...  
O.k. got to stop thinking about that. I've got to stop thinking about 'what if'. I just need to prevent Ian from  
hurting my baby again!   
I WILL NOT LET ANYBODY HURT HIM!  
NOT FUCKING HOBBES, NOT IAN NOT ANYBODY ELSE!!!  
But what about me? What if I will hurt him again!!???  
Will I be able to give him what he wants, what he NEEDS?  
I need to stop thinking about him and me right now.  
Right NOW I need go to him, need to see how he feels and see if his hand's o.k. I've got to...  
Christ, Brian! Just go over there already!

I'm going to the bar.  
Good, Daphne saw me. "Hi Brian!"  
I'm now standing near them. "HI BRAIN"  
I'm saying hi to both of them and Daphne as she's leaving us alone.  
"What's the matter, Sunshine, don't want stay alone with me?" I ask him with tounge in cheek.  
He gives me a fake smile "Yeah, I'm afraid you're going to eat me. "  
"Don't worry then, I'm don't chew,I only swallow".I say smiling at him.  
"BRIANNNN! That disgusting even for you" he's saying that  
but he's laughing at the same. Finally I'm able to see it...  
To see his real 'Sunshine smile'!  
Now both of us are laughing really hard. God! I miss 'us'.  
I don't know why but suddenly I stop to laugh and  
I'm looking at his beautiful eyes and I touch his hair and...And I'm moving my hand to hold his neck.  
"Why didn't you come to me, Justin?" I've got to know.  
"Brian, I hmmmm"he is trying to avoid this talk but the fuck,I won't let him.  
"You what Justin? You should have come to me!You should have known that I would have given you help"I say softly so he knows I'm telling the truth.  
"I don't need help!" god! I should have known it wasn't going to be easy.  
"Justin he hit you!"I say to his face.  
"He didn't hit me"He is trying to hide from me now.  
"I was there, Justin I saw some of what is going on" Why the fuck is he defending him.  
"Come on! Sunshine you can't tell me that…"I start to say he cuts me of.  
"Brian, just drop it" I'm not going to drop it.  
"Justin you can't be with him. He's a shit... you can't waste your life like that I mean he's not worth it."I will hurt IAN if Justin goes home to him.  
" You need to leave him… you can live with Deb… hell you knows she would love it.And… and if it doesn't work you can come and live with me."I will do anything to get him from Ian.  
"JUST LEAVE HIM, JUSTIN!!!" I hear my voice and I know it's loud and I want to stop screaming, but I can't.I have to get him away from him before something happens to my baby again.  
"I Did"He saids but I am still wrapped around the fact he could get hurt to hear him  
"FOR GOD'S SAKE JUSTIN YOU NEED TO…"I start getting fucking scared for him.And Brian Fucking Kinney doesnt show fear,but right now I dont care.I want him safe.  
"I DID IT, BRIAN!I left" he screams at me but then puts his head down. to where I couldnt hear the second part.  
"Did what?"I ask him,wanting to be sure of what he said.   
"I left him" He saids again.  
Oh! Thanks god!I am so glad to hear that from my baby..Justings mouth.  
"Good". I say,letting out a breath I didnt know I was holding.  
"Christ, Brian you didn’t even listen to me so what's the point of all this conviction, mmmm?"He asks me looking defeated,yet again.  
"This is the point" And without thinking I put my lips on his.  
He needs to know. And this is the only way I can explain, right now.  
I need to let him know… I need to show him how much…  
GOD I MISSED HIM SO MUCH! I MISSED MY BABY!

DAPHNE:  
I left Woody's and now I'm on my way to my apartment.  
God! I was so happy to see them kissing.It's about fucking time.  
This fucking Ethan… from the moment I saw him I knew…  
Well it's not exactly the truth. At first I thought he was o.k. But as soon as I knew what he asked from Justin…  
I mean who the fuck does he think he is? To ask from Juster…  
To go back and be in the closet. With every thing he went through.  
God I'm happy he left him.  
Good I'm here; maybe I'll have some time to study for this fucking test.  
Yeah… Sure that's what you going to do. Rightttttttt.  
Fuck. Why is the door open  
" Justin, I'm gonna kill you!." I say out loud.but he doesnt say anything back.  
"I only asked him to shut the door and he can't even do…" I start to say but then...  
"OH MY GOD!"I yell.  
"SHUT YOUR MOUTH, YOU BITCH!!!"Ethan yells at me.  
"Ethan?" I can hardly speak. What? God!!!  
"Where is he?"He is asking.  
"What are you talking about?" I hope he went to the loft with Brian.  
"You whore, you need to tell me where HE is NOW?" He screams.  
"Ethan, listen…" I don’t have any idea what I'm going to say to him,But I need to gain some control over this  
."I won't ask you again! Where the fuck is he!!!???" He looks at me with those eyes.God what am I going to do!!!???   
He screams again and I can't think. I need to get out of here.  
"Ethan listen… listen I only came here to take some thing..I mean… I'm sleeping at my boyfriend's place tonight.   
"And I didn’t even see Justin today!"I am trying to keep myself calm.  
"YOU FILTHY WHORE!!! He continues screaming!  
Only this time he also hits me. I think that my nose is bleeding.  
"Always knew that your against me. That you love Brain.Well you know what, Daphne? I don't care who you love.  
Because I love Justin and he loves me and " He is going on and on..  
"HE DOESN'T LOVE YOU! HE RUNS AWAY FROM YOU!" I didn’t mean to say it but, god; I don’t know what to do.  
And then I feel his fist again. And again and again…. God! God help me!  
"HEY… DAPHNE WHAT'S WRONG? I CAN HEAR YOU ALL OVER THE PLACE???"I can hear Justin.  
OH! MY GOD! JUSTIN HIS HERE!  
"JUSTIN RUN!" I tried to warn him but it's to late now.

BRIAN:  
I'm at the loft sitting next to the computer trying to work on the new file but its useless.  
I can't do it. Surprise, surprise… all I can think of it's him.  
I'm thinking about our conversation and about what's happening after that.  
"Christ!" his lips felt so good. So fucking good!  
To say the least… I was disappointed when he stopped the kiss so suddenly…   
But after he explained I can really understand him.He needs time to heal. He need some time to be alone.  
Well… I'll give him all the time he needs and then… SHIT…  
Who's on phone now? I'm picking the phone up.  
"BRIAN AH..JU JU.. POLICE…BBRRR"I hear Daphne screaming into the phone.  
"DAPHNE… WHAT'S WRONG?" Somethings happened.  
I can hear from the sound of her voice that she's in complete hysteria.  
"BRIAN…BRIAN YOU NEED TO COME TO MY MY… JUSTIN'S HERE AND..."  
"DAPHNE! DAPHNE! FUCK! ANSWER ME!" But the line is dead.  
I need to go and look for him. I'm taking my cell phone and my car keys.  
I'm trying to lock the door but I can't 'cause my hands… god Justin's hand…  
What if he hurt it again. What if something worse happened?  
Fuck the door. I'm running down the stairs. Where is he?  
I'm trying to remember what she said.  
God! He's at Daphne's apartment.   
I'm driving there as fast as I can. "Justin, hang on I'm coming!"I say to noone but myself.  
Fuck there is a lot of traffics out here.   
"Move it you assholes. Come on!"I am screaming,panic is taking over.  
Sunshine I'm coming… I'm coming baby. FUCK!  
"FUCK!!!" What if he got hurt really bad again!!!???  
I don't think I can see him like that… to see blood all over him!  
To sit in the waiting chair in the fucking hospital.  
To pray to god, to ask him to save my baby.   
Now I'm in the street that Daphne lives on.  
I'm getting out of the car; I don't even bother to lock it.  
I'm entering the building. Going up it the stairs as .fast as I can.  
I'm opening the door to the apartment.  
"JUSTIN!!!" I'm yelling. And then I can see him.  
I SEE ETHAN!  
HE'S ON THE GROUND!  
AND MY BABY TOO! GOD MY BABY IS BLEEDING!  
ETHAN LIYNG ON HIM!  
"JUSTIN!!! I'm about to go there and to pull Ethan off.  
I want to get him out of my baby's face.  
"STOP RIGHT THERE!!!" I hear from behind me.  
.  
The police came in. One of the officers is taking Ethan away.  
"Justin?" I call him' while he still lying on the floor.  
I kneel down. "Sunshine?" I'm calling him again.  
"Brian?" he finely reacts  
"Yes… baby it's me."I say gently.  
He's trying to get up' but I'm putting an arm on his chest. Preventing him from making any move.I still don’t know how bad he got hurt.  
What if he broke something in his body?  
But he's getting up. He's sitting, putting himself in my arms.  
And I hold him gently as I can.runngin my fingers through his hair.  
"Its o.k. I'm here." I keep saying over to him.  
And it's like I don't know who I'm trying to convince …. him or me.  
He puts his head in the crevice of my neck and is crying.  
I can hear he's saying something, but I can't understand what is it.  
So I'm pull back enough to see his face..  
I hold his beautiful face and ask him what he said.  
"Thanks" he almost died and that's what he's saying  
"For what? I didn't do anything." I say to him running my hand down his face smiling at him. Knowing he is safe in my arms again.  
He doesn't say anything back, he just returns to my arms. Holding me tight as he can.  
And I don’t need any answers. I just need him to stay in my arms… to stay with me forever.

After a month:  
JUSTIN:   
I'm sitting together with Daphne in our tiny apartment. We're watching this stupid movie.  
I don’t care about the movie, but I care about us.  
Since the Ethan incident we spend a lot time together. Both of us have learned to appreciate our friendship after everything that happened.  
"Justin" Daphne cuts into my line of thoughts.  
"Yes?" I ask her.  
"Did you see him?" she's asking me of the blue.  
"See who?" pretending I don’t know who's she's talking about.  
"Young man, don’t play dumb with me. You know that I know you to well." and the truth is..she does.  
"Daph I…." fucking shit I don’t want to talk about Brian.  
"Juster. I only asked you a simple yes/no question. So what's your problem?And besides… it is about time that one of you assholes move his lazy ass and do something. I mean for god sakes…don't u think…?" she saids matter of factly.  
I stop to listen to her. Not that she's not right 'cause I know she is… but what if he doesn’t want me anymore . I mean its been along time and I did pushed him away the last time he tried to kiss me. And I told him that I needed time. But I mean, it's been a month already… and I thought he'd come to me and…  
Oh! Maybe he wants me to come to him. Well… face it Justin you where always the one that chases after Brian and not the other way around.  
Anyway…I need to do something.


	3. Mistakes Made Right

Thanks again to Shiri who wrote this and I did some english to it and sent it to my beta who is the best.Ponga. Also thx to my friends again.Let me know what you think so I can pass it onto Shiri.

* * *

BRIAN:  
I'm at Babylon now. Its boring as hell and I don’t have the patience to stand like a fucking idiot with the guys… pretending that I'm enjoying the small talk.  
I'll just go tell Michel that I'm goin home. I'm walking to the bar… and then I see him.  
God he is so… so fucking hot. With his blue eyes and his gorgeous long blond hair.  
Maybe small talk in the bar isn’t so bad after all.   
"So Sunshine, how are you feeling?" I hear Emmett ask him this annoying but politely question that I know for a fact that he hates.   
"Justin! Long time no see. Buy me a drink" I tell him that but, what I really want is to prevent Emmett from asking all these questions…and hey… be honest Brian you want all his attention to yourself.  
"Hey Brian" he's saying with a shy smile I looove his smile… I can swallow him in one piece when he's smiling like that.  
"Here is your drink, Brian" he's giving the glass to me. And suddenly we stare at each other. Knowing…  
I'm putting the glass back on the bar after I empty it.  
I'm holding his hand and dragging him to the dance floor with out any warning or invitation. I have this feeling that I need to do IT now. Like its NOW OR NEVER.  
We're standing in the middle of the dance floor. And it’s a bit embarrassing and strange to be like this again… to put my arms around him again… but at the same time it feels so familiar to be with him like this again.  
I look into his eye and I know he feels the same. He's looking down like he's afraid to look at me.  
"Justin, what's wrong?" I ask him and he looks up at me.  
He continues looking at me . Looking but not saying anything.  
Continuing to look in each other eyes and I've got to ask: "Will it be O.k. if I kiss you?"  
He's not giving me an answer and I start to feel like I made big mistake… maybe it was too soon. Maybe he needs more time.  
But then I can hear him laughing… laughing really hard.  
"Since when does Brian Fucking Kinney need to ask?" fucking twat I'm trying to be nice and he's laughing at me.   
"Fine! I won't ask next time" I tell him and move my lips toward his.Our lips meeting and I can feel the passion once again in me.  
Oh god! Its feels so fucking good!  
We stop kissing and we just hold each other. And he puts his head onto my shoulder.  
Its feels good but still, I know my baby and I know that something's bothering him.  
And I did promise myself that I would ask this time.  
"Justin… what's wrong? Is it too soon?"I ask him with concern.Something Brian Kinney doesn't do,but with Justin I've always failed at hiding.  
"No" he answers.   
"So?" the last thing that I want to do is to push him to hard… but I did learn that it's better to ask.  
"I'm just… I don’t know, scared… I guess" he's saids in a really quiet voice.  
"Of what?" I ask him,wondering what my brave angel is afraid of.  
"I'm scared that I'll make mistakes again… with us I mean" oh! Is all I can think.  
"Will it make you feel better if I tell you that I'm sacred too?"I say to him,running my fingers in his hair.Letting him know that I'm serious.  
This fucking kid the things he's doing to me. Has ALWAYS done to me.  
And I can hear him laughing again…" Since when are you scared of anything?" I guess that I deserved that and that I supposed to laugh to but instead…  
"Things change, Sunshine. I know that I need to open up to you more." I said that and I know I'm serious because its true.  
"Brian" he wants to say something but I'm not letting him.  
"And … tell you that I care for you and…" I stop to take a deep breath.  
And … things will be different for us… I mean… " I am trying to say the words.  
"Brian" he is trying to get my attention.  
"Wait. Justin I need to tell you some things. Come on… I'm trying here." I begin oh hell:  
"And…OH! FOR FUCKING SAKE. I LOVE YOU. O.K?" Finelly I said it.I actually said it and I am still alive.Damn this boy..no man for making me feel this way.  
"I love you too, Brian!" I hear him saying back.Smiling that fucking Sunshine smile and I lose it again.  
And we're holding each other smiling at one another and then we start to kiss again.  
And I think to myself…. Some mistakes can be made right.


End file.
